Is children's poor control a psychological problem
Publish: 2021-04-21 16:53:42
1. Doctor: Hello!
2. Children are often grumpy, which may have something to do with the surrounding environment. In this case, parents must calm down and encourage their children slowly, so that their personality can be more sunny. Children with lonely personality generally do not have good friends. At this time, they should also develop their own favorite things and hobbies for their children, Encourage her often, for a long time, the child will improve!
3. Self control
refers to people's ability to consciously control their emotions and behaviors. They are not only good at motivating themselves to implement the decisions bravely, but also good at restraining those desires, motivations, behaviors and emotions that do not conform to the established purpose. Self control is an important sign of strength. On the contrary, it is willful. Inlge in yourself and don't restrict what you say or do. Act arbitrarily, regardless of the behavior and consequences and the impact of the situation<
self control
refers to self-control. It refers to the control of a person's own impulses, feelings and desires.
self control is the embodiment of a person's maturity.
without self-control, there will be no good habits.
without good habits, there will be no good life.
the most powerful people are those who can control themselves,
lack of self-control, but talk about success in vain, just like blind people talking about color
self control is the behavior that people will have after growing up step by step, being influenced by and experiencing in life. Children have no self-control, because they can't control their own behavior, experience too little, and can't realize that they should control themselves.
refers to people's ability to consciously control their emotions and behaviors. They are not only good at motivating themselves to implement the decisions bravely, but also good at restraining those desires, motivations, behaviors and emotions that do not conform to the established purpose. Self control is an important sign of strength. On the contrary, it is willful. Inlge in yourself and don't restrict what you say or do. Act arbitrarily, regardless of the behavior and consequences and the impact of the situation<
self control
refers to self-control. It refers to the control of a person's own impulses, feelings and desires.
self control is the embodiment of a person's maturity.
without self-control, there will be no good habits.
without good habits, there will be no good life.
the most powerful people are those who can control themselves,
lack of self-control, but talk about success in vain, just like blind people talking about color
self control is the behavior that people will have after growing up step by step, being influenced by and experiencing in life. Children have no self-control, because they can't control their own behavior, experience too little, and can't realize that they should control themselves.
4.
1. The impact of the environment
because of the bright colors and pleasant sounds, children like to watch TV, especially cartoons. However, as soon as they enter the school, the monotonous classroom is difficult to attract children's attention and interest, so the behavior of inattention appears. In the current ecation mode can not be changed, it is suggested that in early childhood and childhood, parents should let their children watch less TV, especially cartoons full of violence, and take their children to participate in games and sports
2. Personal character and temperament reasons
every child's natural temperament is different, some children are impatient, some children are quiet. Children with a bad temper often can't control their behavior. But this kind of mood, has the congenital factor, also has the day after tomorrow's influence, if the parents are short tempered, can directly affect the child's character
3. The influence of bad ecation methods
violent discipline, or indifference to children, laissez faire, or overinlgence will lead to children's lack of self-control and weak willpower
4. The influence of parents
a warm family atmosphere is too important for children. If parents often lose their temper and quarrel in front of their children, children will become grumpy and impatient in such an atmosphere. As the saying goes, parents are children's first teachers. Children often learn common sense by imitating alts in the process of growing up. Parents' self-control is poor, and children can't learn how to control their temper from parents< br />
5. The main symptoms of ADHD in children are emotional instability, impulsivity and willfulness. They are prone to lose their temper, disobey discipline, and their academic performance is not very good. If your child has ADHD, it is recommended that you take him to a regular hospital for examination.
6. What's wrong with children's poor self-control? Children can't calm down to learn, which has a lot to do with poor self-control. They may have attention disorder. Liuliu suggests that parents should observe whether their children have other behaviors at this time. Excessive activity is a kind of behavior of ADHD
specifically, he often appears restless, has many small movements of hands and feet, can't sit quietly, and wriggles around in his seat. Leave your seat in the classroom or other quiet places, and run or climb everywhere. It's hard to engage in quiet activities or games, and keep busy all day
children with mild ADHD just can't concentrate on their study and can't take the initiative to study, resulting in the decline of academic performance; They can't control themselves in their behaviors, they are disobedient and discriminated against
the academic performance of children with severe ADHD decreased significantly, and it was difficult to finish primary school and junior high school. With the growth of age, e to lack of self-control, it is easy to be influenced and lured by bad external factors, which can lead to fighting, lying and stealing, and even crime
of course, hyperactivity is not equal to ADHD. Parents can distinguish it from the following points
1. Hyperactive children only occasionally have the performance of inattention, and they can focus on the things they are interested in, but ADHD children can't< 2. Hyperactive children can control their own behavior, but hyperactive children can't, although they are loose, such as making small movements in class, sleeping, whispering, etc
3. Normal children are flexible in fast, repetitive and rotation movements, while ADHD children are clumsy
4. When taking sedatives, hyperactive children will be very quiet, while ADHD children will show obvious excitement and hyperactivity; The opposite is true when taking central nervous system stimulants
ADHD is common in school-age children, but 70% of them have symptoms until puberty, and 30% - 50% of them have symptoms until althood. At present, children's psychiatrists generally believe that ADHD is a chronic disease that affects life
children's self-control ability is relatively weak before 4 years old, and graally forms after 5 years old, and basically forms around 12 years old. Before the age of 12, it is very important for parents to cultivate their children's self-control. They will not only benefit from completing their homework, but also form a very good quality in their future growth
self control is reflected in the children's control of their own behavior and emotions. The mastery of self-control is the children's conscious control, and the parents can only play an auxiliary role<
three ways to improve children's self-control
many social skills need self-control
when children show this quality, praise them and point out what they need to improve. It takes self-control to listen, to know when and how to interrupt, to control anger, to report after a task is completed
learning responsibility
routine, housework and family schele in the morning become opportunities for children to learn responsibility and self-control
responsibility is to do the right thing without being watched. The reward of responsibility is privilege. If they can do what they should do before a certain time in the morning, they will have the privilege to play with toys for half an hour in the evening
appropriate rewards
when a child gets a reward for completing a job, or even a star or special treatment on the star chart, talk about self-control
external rewards provide a good opportunity to discuss internal rewards. Or the real benefit of reward is not material, but the establishment of self-control. You have to make your child very determined and get up every morning. He will try to show his self-control
What's wrong with children's poor self-control? If through the above methods, children's self-control has not been improved, we must go to a specialist hospital to see a doctor, early detection, early intervention!
specifically, he often appears restless, has many small movements of hands and feet, can't sit quietly, and wriggles around in his seat. Leave your seat in the classroom or other quiet places, and run or climb everywhere. It's hard to engage in quiet activities or games, and keep busy all day
children with mild ADHD just can't concentrate on their study and can't take the initiative to study, resulting in the decline of academic performance; They can't control themselves in their behaviors, they are disobedient and discriminated against
the academic performance of children with severe ADHD decreased significantly, and it was difficult to finish primary school and junior high school. With the growth of age, e to lack of self-control, it is easy to be influenced and lured by bad external factors, which can lead to fighting, lying and stealing, and even crime
of course, hyperactivity is not equal to ADHD. Parents can distinguish it from the following points
1. Hyperactive children only occasionally have the performance of inattention, and they can focus on the things they are interested in, but ADHD children can't< 2. Hyperactive children can control their own behavior, but hyperactive children can't, although they are loose, such as making small movements in class, sleeping, whispering, etc
3. Normal children are flexible in fast, repetitive and rotation movements, while ADHD children are clumsy
4. When taking sedatives, hyperactive children will be very quiet, while ADHD children will show obvious excitement and hyperactivity; The opposite is true when taking central nervous system stimulants
ADHD is common in school-age children, but 70% of them have symptoms until puberty, and 30% - 50% of them have symptoms until althood. At present, children's psychiatrists generally believe that ADHD is a chronic disease that affects life
children's self-control ability is relatively weak before 4 years old, and graally forms after 5 years old, and basically forms around 12 years old. Before the age of 12, it is very important for parents to cultivate their children's self-control. They will not only benefit from completing their homework, but also form a very good quality in their future growth
self control is reflected in the children's control of their own behavior and emotions. The mastery of self-control is the children's conscious control, and the parents can only play an auxiliary role<
three ways to improve children's self-control
many social skills need self-control
when children show this quality, praise them and point out what they need to improve. It takes self-control to listen, to know when and how to interrupt, to control anger, to report after a task is completed
learning responsibility
routine, housework and family schele in the morning become opportunities for children to learn responsibility and self-control
responsibility is to do the right thing without being watched. The reward of responsibility is privilege. If they can do what they should do before a certain time in the morning, they will have the privilege to play with toys for half an hour in the evening
appropriate rewards
when a child gets a reward for completing a job, or even a star or special treatment on the star chart, talk about self-control
external rewards provide a good opportunity to discuss internal rewards. Or the real benefit of reward is not material, but the establishment of self-control. You have to make your child very determined and get up every morning. He will try to show his self-control
What's wrong with children's poor self-control? If through the above methods, children's self-control has not been improved, we must go to a specialist hospital to see a doctor, early detection, early intervention!
7. Due to poor self-control and inattention, children always move around in school, either looking around, or not moving in their seats, or provoking others and influencing others' learning, so they don't have a few minutes of peace of mind in a class. At home, they are even more "unscrupulous" and "reckless"
it is suggested that parents should set an example for their children to control their emotions. The root cause of many children's lack of self-control is that their parents have no self-control. It can be said that behind every child with emotional disorder, there are some psychological problems of parents. Just imagine, for a moody parent who always takes out his anger on his children, the method and strategy of emotional self-control:
strategy 1: attention diversion method. When children are in bad mood, encourage children to choose what they like to do to divert their attention. For example, when a child feels sad, you can guide him: "when you are sad, you can find something to make yourself happy. Would you like to watch TV or go out and play now? " Guide the child to choose one of the two choices. In the process of selection, the child's attention will be diverted< Strategy 2: delay satisfaction method. When children are worried that their needs are not met, you can consciously guide them to have a positive thinking: all this is temporary, and their needs will be met later< Strategy 3: self control. Encourage children to use positive self suggestion to control their emotions and behaviors. For example, let the children silently count "1, 2, 3..." or say "I don't get angry, I can control myself" when they are angry, so as to avoid impulsive behavior.
it is suggested that parents should set an example for their children to control their emotions. The root cause of many children's lack of self-control is that their parents have no self-control. It can be said that behind every child with emotional disorder, there are some psychological problems of parents. Just imagine, for a moody parent who always takes out his anger on his children, the method and strategy of emotional self-control:
strategy 1: attention diversion method. When children are in bad mood, encourage children to choose what they like to do to divert their attention. For example, when a child feels sad, you can guide him: "when you are sad, you can find something to make yourself happy. Would you like to watch TV or go out and play now? " Guide the child to choose one of the two choices. In the process of selection, the child's attention will be diverted< Strategy 2: delay satisfaction method. When children are worried that their needs are not met, you can consciously guide them to have a positive thinking: all this is temporary, and their needs will be met later< Strategy 3: self control. Encourage children to use positive self suggestion to control their emotions and behaviors. For example, let the children silently count "1, 2, 3..." or say "I don't get angry, I can control myself" when they are angry, so as to avoid impulsive behavior.
8. Many experts in ecation have said a similar saying, that is, to correct a child's shortcomings is not to find a shortcoming and criticize and correct one, but to cultivate more advantages, There will be less and less room for a child's shortcomings.
focusing on a child's shortcomings alone can not improve the child. You should focus on the child's advantages, praise him more, communicate more, and talk more about his strengths. Only in this way can the child develop in a better and better direction.
what you say about his shortcomings every day, In fact, it's a kind of language hypnosis, and the child's subconscious will feel worse and worse, so the level of self-esteem will decline. If you treat him with a kind of appreciative language, it's a kind of positive reinforcement, and the child's self-image will be better and better, and the level of self-esteem will be higher and higher. In order to maintain this hard won good image, Children will consciously strive to do their best.
I think there must be something wrong with your ecation method, whether you admit it or not, because if it is correct, it is impossible to have such a result
you may have said the truth thousands of times, but it can't be realized, whether it's punishment or reward
if you do something wrong, you must let the child experience the consequences (for example, cancel a welfare and privilege that the child usually enjoys). If you do something right, you can also increase a welfare or privilege, but it's better not to give frequent material rewards, and it's better to give spiritual rewards. Whether it's rewards or punishments, don't make too frequent verbal promises, Once promised, it must be fulfilled
punishment can be the cancellation of welfare, reward can be verbal praise, can also be realized desire
if you do something wrong, children will only hear your nagging, but they don't have to pay for it; If you do the right thing, but ultimately it is difficult to achieve the desire, then over time, children will lose interest in the right and wrong things, and turn to their own way
it is suggested to find effective reward and punishment methods according to the characteristics of children, and clarify the consequences and responsibilities.
focusing on a child's shortcomings alone can not improve the child. You should focus on the child's advantages, praise him more, communicate more, and talk more about his strengths. Only in this way can the child develop in a better and better direction.
what you say about his shortcomings every day, In fact, it's a kind of language hypnosis, and the child's subconscious will feel worse and worse, so the level of self-esteem will decline. If you treat him with a kind of appreciative language, it's a kind of positive reinforcement, and the child's self-image will be better and better, and the level of self-esteem will be higher and higher. In order to maintain this hard won good image, Children will consciously strive to do their best.
I think there must be something wrong with your ecation method, whether you admit it or not, because if it is correct, it is impossible to have such a result
you may have said the truth thousands of times, but it can't be realized, whether it's punishment or reward
if you do something wrong, you must let the child experience the consequences (for example, cancel a welfare and privilege that the child usually enjoys). If you do something right, you can also increase a welfare or privilege, but it's better not to give frequent material rewards, and it's better to give spiritual rewards. Whether it's rewards or punishments, don't make too frequent verbal promises, Once promised, it must be fulfilled
punishment can be the cancellation of welfare, reward can be verbal praise, can also be realized desire
if you do something wrong, children will only hear your nagging, but they don't have to pay for it; If you do the right thing, but ultimately it is difficult to achieve the desire, then over time, children will lose interest in the right and wrong things, and turn to their own way
it is suggested to find effective reward and punishment methods according to the characteristics of children, and clarify the consequences and responsibilities.
9. Self control is the ability that people can control their negative emotions and impulses and better restrain their thoughts, words and deeds. With strong self-control, a person can consciously and flexibly control his emotions, face up to all external stimuli such as desire, temptation and difficulty, better regulate and control his thoughts and actions, and unswervingly achieve his goals. Children's lack of self-control also has a great impact on them
first, the impact and performance of children's lack of self-control
children's academic problems are just the tip of the iceberg. Children who lack self-control lack competitiveness in emotion, interpersonal and life
1. They are weak in emotional control, irritable, irritable and prone to depression
2. Weak interpersonal control, unsociable, unable to abide by the rules of the game, easily influenced by others<
3. Weak life control, unwilling to wait and enre, unable to control desire, unable to achieve goals.
scientific research has proved that children with good self-control can have better quality of life in the future. In April 2011, a study on children's self-control in the United States released its results. The study covered 1000 children, tracking from birth to 32 years old. The results showed that children who can show good self-control in childhood seldom become addicted or commit crimes in althood, and are healthier and richer than those who are impulsive
Second, how to cultivate children's self-control ability
it needs systematic methods and enough time to improve any of the nine abilities of children's Eq. in this process, it is not only necessary to change children's behavior habits, but also more important to guide parents to create a supportive environment for Eq
1. Appropriately delay the satisfaction of children's desire. For example, for a toddler, when he is interested in a toy, parents can use the toy to guide him to learn to walk independently, that is, let him get the toy after hard work and hard work
2. When the family buys back delicious food, parents can set a snack time for the just sensible children, that is, they are not allowed to eat before the scheled time
3. For primary school children, we can give them enough pocket money, but ask them to save as much as possible
4. When children get up early, they are required to set the alarm clock by themselves instead of being urged by their parents
5. Learning habits (such as the choice and arrangement of homework time after going home), expectations and goals of academic performance, etc. should be finally decided by children under the guidance of parents
6. If your child is in junior high school, in & quot; Unlimited & quot; If he can control himself and seldom watch TV, he will have great hope in the future. It also shows that the child's will and psychological quality are excellent
7. It's inevitable that children's emotions will fluctuate. They can cry and make a scene regardless. Parents should remind them to return to normal as soon as possible after the event. If a child plays & quot; Small temper;, For one or two days, it's not self-control and self-regulation
the above are the influence and Realization of children's lack of self-control, and some methods of how to enhance children's self-control.
first, the impact and performance of children's lack of self-control
children's academic problems are just the tip of the iceberg. Children who lack self-control lack competitiveness in emotion, interpersonal and life
1. They are weak in emotional control, irritable, irritable and prone to depression
2. Weak interpersonal control, unsociable, unable to abide by the rules of the game, easily influenced by others<
3. Weak life control, unwilling to wait and enre, unable to control desire, unable to achieve goals.
scientific research has proved that children with good self-control can have better quality of life in the future. In April 2011, a study on children's self-control in the United States released its results. The study covered 1000 children, tracking from birth to 32 years old. The results showed that children who can show good self-control in childhood seldom become addicted or commit crimes in althood, and are healthier and richer than those who are impulsive
Second, how to cultivate children's self-control ability
it needs systematic methods and enough time to improve any of the nine abilities of children's Eq. in this process, it is not only necessary to change children's behavior habits, but also more important to guide parents to create a supportive environment for Eq
1. Appropriately delay the satisfaction of children's desire. For example, for a toddler, when he is interested in a toy, parents can use the toy to guide him to learn to walk independently, that is, let him get the toy after hard work and hard work
2. When the family buys back delicious food, parents can set a snack time for the just sensible children, that is, they are not allowed to eat before the scheled time
3. For primary school children, we can give them enough pocket money, but ask them to save as much as possible
4. When children get up early, they are required to set the alarm clock by themselves instead of being urged by their parents
5. Learning habits (such as the choice and arrangement of homework time after going home), expectations and goals of academic performance, etc. should be finally decided by children under the guidance of parents
6. If your child is in junior high school, in & quot; Unlimited & quot; If he can control himself and seldom watch TV, he will have great hope in the future. It also shows that the child's will and psychological quality are excellent
7. It's inevitable that children's emotions will fluctuate. They can cry and make a scene regardless. Parents should remind them to return to normal as soon as possible after the event. If a child plays & quot; Small temper;, For one or two days, it's not self-control and self-regulation
the above are the influence and Realization of children's lack of self-control, and some methods of how to enhance children's self-control.
10.
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